I guess you could say we’re an atypical couple; however, with my severe sheltered-ness, my concept of typical might be outdated. Weddings are these huge to-dos, where two entire families gather, along with close friends, stuff themselves inside a church and get all weepy-eyed, maybe even a twinge of envy, as they celebrate the joining of two people. There are lots of queazy stomachs, fragile nerves, bored children, screaming children, and a pastor who hopes he doesn’t get the names wrong at that critical moment. Once the organ blasts the first notes, a pair of double doors open and it’s all eyes on the bride.
Oh, dear god, please no! *cue the sound of a record screeching to silence*
Ever since Simon and I have started talking spending the rest of our lives together–well, in earnest (we talked lifelong plans as far back as last summer and often reminded ourselves we weren’t even dating)–how to handle the wedding has been niggling at us. I’ve been to a whole two weddings in my childhood, both of which are a vague collection of memories, one of them including people speaking Polish in front of the church. The rest of my wedding samplings have come from movies, television, and family albums. Movies and television are somewhat disjointed from reality, sooooo I don’t have much to go on. And then shows like Bridezillas make me stare in mute horror at the screen. Thankfully I’m in no danger of becoming that. So. Let’s keep this simple.
After a bit of a sage advice passed to me through Facebook, I talked to both of my parents, asking them how they envisioned me getting married. They both said it was up to Simon and I. Dad would happily walk me down the aisle, or happily attend the reception after we eloped. I told them both Simon and I would rather elope. We have no desire to spend a zillion bucks for just one day of glitz and glam. We could get another car/truck or save up for a downpayment on a house, or even knock off a chuck of what I owe in college loans. So, elope it is.
Okay, now where the heck do we elope to?
Now that we’ve signed the lease for another year in Safford, that’s opened us up to pondering on actual marriage. We thought of Italy, since Simon has family stationed there with the U.S. military, but that’d have to wait until 2015, since we already have stuff planned for July and August. Maybe somewhere romantic and gorgeous in California? Get married on a beach or something. Meh. Cliché.
The more we tried to plan our own wedding, the more our brains turned to goo. But out of that dual pile of goo jumped a brilliant idea: elope to Kansas during our July 4th vacation and let someone else hash out the details. Simon texted our friend Tammy, who leapt at the idea. Ten minutes later, she had a date and time set up, and invitations were going out via a Facebook group. Another friend of ours, Penny, offered to be our photographer, since she already does that professionally. Hell yeah! Things are finally falling into place. So, July 4th at 1PM at a location of Tammy’s choosing. She’s also taken care of finding us someone who’s ordained, too. Go, Tammy! 😀
The day will be spent outside with wonderful people, and will conclude with lots of July 4th fireworks (no innuendo intended). It’ll be a day to remember, which is all we want. The most important part of our wedding is to build fond memories.
Now that we got that out of the way, the rings, the dress, and the rental tux are next. We’ve been looking at rings and it’s been a bit of a headache. I don’t care about the ring since I don’t wear jewelry and am aware that it’s just a scam orchestrated by jewelers, but Simon insists. Rings have been embedded in American tradition, so rings it is. He wants a simple gold band and I’ll take whatever looks pretty that doesn’t cost an arm and leg. We looked at gaming-themed rings, but they’re either super expensive or super cheap, and Simon wants to spend enough where it feels like he’s making a statement that he intends to take care of me for life. Fair enough.
Websites had some neat stuff but they didn’t have any World of Warcraft-themed rings. All our attempts to find some led us either to wowhead.com or to these cheap pieces of crap under 40 bucks. The idea was to pay tribute to the MMO we met in, along with our love of video games, but it looks like we’ll be going the plainer route. We’re headed to a local jeweler June 2nd.
Wedding: check. Rings: almost check. Dress: on deck.
Despite my disinterest in looking pretty at any given moment, I want to look pretty on my wedding day. I’ll be doing the whole makeup and hair deal, and wear a dress that makes me feel even prettier. Still, I’m hoping to find a decent one for under 300 bucks. Hopefully that’s reasonable. This dress is the style I have in mind:
Reception: details still need to be hashed out.
We’d like to set it for sometime this fall in California. It’ll be within easy reach of Simon’s family, and a nice vacation trip for mine to fly out to. We were originally thinking one reception on the east coast, and one on the west coast, but everyone in my family told me they’d happily fly out to Cali, so one it is. Also, fall bear more comfortable weather and gives people a chance to start planning ahead. Obviously many more details to come.
Getting proposed to: ummmm… yeah, we’re doing things out of order. Simon’ll get to that before the wedding. He already knows I’m gonna say yes.
As soon as the date and time of the wedding were set, a wave of fear passed through me. I’m getting married. I’m really getting married. I’m gonna be with one person forever, for the rest of my life. What if all this is a mistake?
I sat down with myself and imagined going the rest of my life without him, and this nauseating fear overtook me. I’d be lost without him. He completes me, has made me the happiest I’ve ever felt, and life the best it’s ever been. I know it in my gut that we’re making the right choice to wed each other. And while that acknowledgement doesn’t remove every last drop of fear, it allows me to look forward to how the rest of our lives will unfold together.